when every decision is the result of 10 factors .... and every decision cascades into 10 more outcomes .... choosing which of the many partial truths to highlight vs ignore in creating a linear narrative.... the choices can be very self-serving and create an illusion of more rationality than really existed at the time...
and for all the conscious thoughts that go into a decision, there's subconscious processing to focus attention on the decision and the associations that arise to be considered and the feelings of certainty / commitment to a decision...
answering the question "why do i do what i do?" seems kinda hopeless- creating a simple narrative of cause & effect, confabulating as needed to satisfy subconscious desires to see myself as reasonable & kind & intelligent... and then what do I do with this model of myself?
and the % of weight that comes down to things like: - i was hungry / thirsty / tired - i was bored / avoiding other things - i wanted to feel connection / that ppl like me & understand me - i got frustrated and impatient... 🤷♀️