my expected value for most possible social interactions is negative. it is rational to be somewhat prickly and avoid social interactions i'm likely to find tiresome ...
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but i feel like there's default social pressure to be friendly and engaging, and practice->skill would be good for pursuing the social experiences i DO want, and that reputation matters and networking etc is an investment that pays off later & indirectly...

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but otoh i also dislike feeling that i'm engaging w someone as means to an end rather than intrinsic enjoyment; and otoh i am often fake-polite out of a sense of social obligation

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