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@mynamebedan in a deep relationship both ppl are attuned to each other's preferences, care a lot about not harming each other, make decisions taking each other into consideration... so they are seeking / sharing / remembering what bothers vs delights them, and acting accordingly

@mynamebedan this all can happen without the weird therapy speak around boundaries; an outsider looking at the relationship still might describe it as looking like the ppl in it have good boundaries
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