i've been questioning myself abt this because i often float around feeling affectionate towards everyone, but then when there's actual effort involved i feel resistance, like i only have so much to give and don't want to be as patient and responsive as i feel i ought to be https://x.com/mimi10v3/status/1732880689362514179
and the link between the emotion and the effort, and the expectation of effort if u express the emotion... i don't express things nearly as often as i feel them because of that link and then even moreso to tell someone you love them and to act accordingly for awhile creates way more expectation and feels like you need a reason to stop the effort....
and wrt the emotional experience, i think it feels good for me but it doesn't directly do anything for others except insofar as it motivates actions ... kinda feel this way abt buddhist metta practice too- sure from the inside ur feeling compassion, and that can work changes internally, but until it manifests in the world as different behavior.... idk sometimes i think ppl (incl me!) just feel the cozy warmth and leave it at that?