reminds me, earlier today I was noticing that I've accumulated quite a bit of tension around the self-monitoring part of my mind-body, contrasting with being fully immersed in the moment and losing the self-monitoring sense of separation & desire to control https://x.com/eshear/status/1689384029165125634
but also, like lol I developed that for a reason, to rein in the bipolar w countermeasures... but could I let it go? have I sufficiently integrated better habits? would it help w the nagging sense of anxiety I've been feeling?
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Quote tweet · Dec 9, 2023sometimes it works this way, other times i'm holding a lot of tension, feel it in my body as much as emotions... 🤷♀️…Reply · Jan 5, 2024@jessicamalonso ew no im tired of splitting off a shard of consciousness for self monitoringReply · Oct 9, 2024@nickcammarata wrt connection & dissolving boundaries around the self- when i move my mind a bit more in that direction it starts to feel really weird…Personal reflectionTweet · Nov 22, 2024noticing how much i'm *holding* rather than being; both low activity states but holding static bodily tension feels much less fluid and is exhausting…